Feeling: Blah.
Random Thought: ...
Music: ...

Slutty is in the hospital. I knew she'd gone in for some intestinal problem, but I thought it was like diverticulitis or something, so I wasn't very worried. It's treatable, and two of my mom's friends have/had it, so...

Anyway, she called today and left a message on the machine. Accoring to her, her "ovaries were absessed and they found clots of blood in her bladder." My mom called her back, and she told her that one of her follopian tubes had ruptured, too. From the way she described her surgery, my mom thinks she probably had a hysterectomy. She's only 27.

Luckily, she was able to have one child before all of this. A girl that was delivered via c-section. I'm wondering if that has something to do with it.

We're by no means close anymore, but I kind of feel sorry for her. And feeling sorry for her makes me cold and angry because I've always felt sorry for her. That was the main reason why I put up with her shit for so long.

I felt sorry that she'd had such an awful childhood. I felt sorry that she got landed in a foster home with a manipulative guardian. I felt sorry that she couldn't seem to grow up. I felt sorry that she would never better herself.

And then I got tired of feeling sorry for things that I didn't do or cause. I got tired of watching her spin her wheels in the muddy rut she still seems to favor.

I gave up caring, and I still don't completely care now.

I don't know when I became this person.

<< - >>

Save The Rayne! - 2004-12-27
Want some popcorn? - 2004-06-23
- - 2004-06-19
Pfft. - 2004-06-12
Wheehaa!! Going to see PoA! - 2004-06-02

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